diet of worms (harlequin__girl) wrote,
diet of worms
harlequin__girl

washmeclean

quick sand;
my heart is sinking.
i try to run,
but I can't stop thinking.
i'm climbing walls
i'm on the ceiling.

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it's going to take a miracle to heal me.

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i'm staring down
into the quarry
i see a stone
for every sorry.

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i'm on the edge
i'm going under
& after i die
i'm going to rise from the water.

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i wanna blast off;
let gravity disappear.
i'm tired of falling,
falling,
falling from the weight of fear.
come & lift me up into the clean and clear.
i'm waiting on you, Jesus, in the water here,
so come and wash me clean.

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the sky is red, there's blood on my hands
i can't deny
i'm guilty where i stand.
the verdict's in
i hear them shouting.

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send me a river to drown this mountain


i may not have the internet for a while.
my mom is diconnecting the phone line because we are moving soon.

oookkkkk.
i want to make a few things clear;

1) i know that i don't take care of myself, or my body.
2) i will go into recovery (again) WHEN & IF i feel ready.
3) you cannot force someone to get help if they are not ready.
it will simply NOT work.
4) do not preach to me & please do not tell me things i already know
(i.e. i look unhealthy, pills are bad for me, i might die)
5) i am COMPLETELY open about my eating disorder, everyone i know knows that i have anorexia/bulimia
6) i am not ashamed for it, & no, i am NOTPROUD of it either.

i think that's it.

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